Not Knowing Your Own History is The Greatest Curse Pt. 1

Greetings Girlies!!

I refused to let a month go by before I made another blog post.

So many exciting things have been happening in my life, so trust me the hiatus was not in vain.

I miss you Conscious Girlie's so much!

I cannot wait to share with you all of my new ventures.

And in celebration of African American Heritage Month/Black History month taking place right now in the United States here's a little black history fact I remind myself frequently:

I am responsible to know my OWN history and determine my OWN future.

Until the next post; Stay Girlie, Stay Conscious

Black Coffee Film Review

Peace Girlies!!

Let's head over to the Conscious Critique Corner™ of the blog. Today I will be providing a review of a movie I saw this weekend. 

First, let me say this this film was brought to my attention by Ronnie and Lamar Tyler, founders of one of my favorite blogs, Black and Married with Kids,  who invited other couples to tag along as they went to see this movie for their date night. Afterwards they invited all the couples for a brief discussion about the film.

It was great meeting The Tylers and conversing with other couples about the film but here are my honest opinions about Black Coffee.

Without giving the entire movie away, here's a brief synopsis about the film from AMC Theaters website:

"Robert (Darrin Henson) picked the wrong time to meet his soul mate! After being fired from his own father's company, he feels like his luck has run out -- until Morgan (Gabrielle Dennis) enters into his life. Just as things start to heat up between them, trouble brews as Morgan's ex-husband (Lamman Rucker) vows to get her back and Robert's gold-digging ex-girlfriend (Erica Hubbard) returns with an agenda of her own. With the help of his cousin (Christian Keyes), Robert's about to find out how much good can come out of a bad situation in this charming romantic comedy that's good to the last drop." 

In the Conscious Critique Corner™ I'll review the film under the categories of good, bad, and great.

The Good:
There's something refreshing about seeing an all black cast in a film that promotes love, entrepreneurship and forgiveness.

From the opening scene, we notice that the main character, Robert, played by Darrin Henson, is hard-working and loyal. Good worth ethics must run deep in this fictional family because his cousin, Julian, played by Christian Keyes, is an entrepreneur that provokes Robert to tap into his skill set and work for himself (even mentioning The Black Wall Street). Morgan, played by Gabrielle Dennis, her ex-husband, Lamman Rucker, and even the book store clerk all left us with the reminder that if you work hard at something it will work out well for you in the end. 

And speaking of a book clerk, most scenes took place in a book store and the nerd in me just squealed in side (Yes...I said squealed)!!

Along with reading, the film also promoted education, creating and supporting black businesses, and forgiveness - all things that the black community could always use more of.

The Bad:
I hate to say it but this film created a "fictional" reality. What I mean by that, is, yes everything that took place in the film could happen, but the likelihood of you and I seeing it in our day-to-day lives are slim to none. I hate saying it because deep down I wish I saw more Black Coffee stories take place. I really do. I wish more people would use a set back as a set up for their success, I wish more brothers and sisters would encourage and support their own, and I wish people would forgive easily so they could think clearly to make their own futures better.

Also, there is a portion in the end that is supposed to show a time lapse and it just didn't come across as that way. What I thought was a couple of days ended up spanning a couple of weeks, maybe even months. I'm still not sure really. Let's just say a wedding scene would have been appreciated.

The Great:
Healthy black relationships were displayed in this film. For example, Even though we don't see her father, it appears that Morgan has a healthy relationship with him and mentions him often. From saying she admired him, to the advice he gave her about handling her real estate. Also another healthy example of a parent-child relationship is Robert and his father who left him a business to take over after he passed. 

There is also no shortage of healthy romantic relationships portrayed in this film either without any sex scenes. Let me repeat, there are no sex scenes in this film. ::breaks out in a happy dance:: Call me weird but I don't feel like adding soft porn bed room scenes is necessary to show that two people love each other. Instead, telling each other the truth, supporting someone to pursue their dreams and encouraging people not to make emotional decisions are, in my opinion, substantial ways to show someone that you love them, all of which were portrayed in the film. 

I would highly recommend you see this film, and support it in any way that you can. It is certainly a must see in my book.Unfortunately, the film is only being show in select theatres across the nation, so make sure its showing at your local theater before you head out.

Check out the trailer, if you haven't seen it already (and in my opinion the trailer does not give the movie away).

If you end up watching Black Coffee leave your thoughts about it in a comment below.

Nail Art Throwback

As I was looking through my phone, and I realized I had lots of fun with nail art over the past couple of months. I'm definitely looking forward to sharing more nail art designs on this blog.

If there are any nail art designs on my collage that you would like me to do a tutorial for just let me know.

Until next time, stay Girly, stay Conscious!

The Four Letter "F" word

So there's this four letter "F" word that I keep hearing.

Honestly, I used to say it too, so it never bothered me when I heard other people say it.

Then after a few life experiences, I matured and realized, I have to rid this word from my vocabulary.

But let me tell you, it was so hard! It was like the second I said that I wanted to get rid of it, it moved into my mind and infiltrated my thoughts and came out of my mouth!

Every time I tried, I would mess up and that word would just slip out. F@#$!

See, there it goes again! Ugh!!!

Now, I'm not sure if this word is stalking me, or if I'm holding on to it, but it has to go!

I know I'm not the only one with this verbal garbage.

You've got it too! And this F word is stinking up your life as well.

Think I'm lying? Well, tell me if this four letter word

"FEAR"

has ever come out of your mouth.

I'm pretty sure it has. But no worries, this is a judgment free zone and we're in recovery together.

First step, is to change our thought patterns (see my previous post about that).

Second step, is to not stress over things we can't control.

You know we only use Fear because we're concerned with what other people think about us. Yup! It's true.

Thoughts like,"What if I fail?" really translate to "what if I disappoint so-and-so?"

Or "I can't because I don't like speaking in front of a lot of people." really translates to "what if those people laugh at me or get bored?"

Well let me break something down to you, there's three types of businesses:

1. Your business
2. Their Business
and
3. Nobody's Business

What people think about you, their business, is nobody's business, but it certainly isn't any of your business.

Think about all that you would accomplish in life if you weren't afraid of what other people thought about you.

Seriously, think about it.

Now the third step is to realize that we only make ourselves more crazy, not more productive, by listening to fear.

Let's look at public speaking for example. More people are afraid of public speaking then dying.

You know what that means?

It means that at a funeral, more people would rather be in the casket then giving the eulogy.

How crazy is that?!

And this is why Fear has to go.

I'm not about to jump in a casket for anybody. Not even fear!

So, I don't know about you, but I've just given FEAR a one-way ticket far away from me.

Now it's up to you to let Fear stay at your house or you can kick it out too.

So, let's stop dropping these F-bombs and make peace with ourselves.

Who's with me?

"Fear is a disease that eats away at logic and makes man inhuman."
Marian Anderson

The Greatest Resolution

About this time...on this day...millions of people are making resolutions.

Resolutions, or promises to themselves, to eat better, go to the gym more frequently, be nicer, the list goes on and on.

But did you know that over 70% of people break their resolutions by February?

So...here's the best resolution you can make to yourself regardless of what your goal(s) may be:

Be consistent!

Here's a secret, Consistency is the key to success!

Applying Knowledge of Self

With the power of the internet, individuals have access to information at their fingertips. Because of this individuals can at least somewhat knowledgable on hundreds of topics. The question now is,

"Are we "learning" or just "collecting information?""

For example, let's say a young child told you that they learned how to tie their shoe laces.

Would your first assumption be that they watched a YouTube video and now they're an expert? Or would it be that they watched someone else and then applied that knowledge in order to tie their shoelace? Probably the latter, right?

The difference between the two is the application step.

Without that we're just hoarding information.

To learn something we must apply it to our lives; from learning how to walk, learning a new language, learning how to flat twist, learning how to support black economics, you name it, application is key!

While I appreciate a YouTube video or a documentary just as much as the next person, my learning doesn't stop once the video does.

It's not enough to have knowledge, one must apply it.

So when we say, "I'm striving to have knowledge of self?" What does that truly mean?

Well, for me it meant learning about my genealogy, learning about melanin, learning about my hair, learning how to live my best life, learning how to unite blacks around the world, and learning that the learning never ends.

But I truly didn't learn anything until I applied the information into my life which I'm still doing.

So what does "knowledge of self" mean to you? And how are you applying that knowledge into your life?

The Power of Positive Self Talk

According to Dr. Caroline Leaf, 87% to 95% of the illnesses that plague us today are a direct result of our thought life. What we think about affects us physically and emotionally. It's an epidemic of toxic emotions.

The average person has over 30,000 thoughts a day. Through an uncontrolled thought life, we create the conditions for illness; we make ourselves sick! Research shows that fear, all on its own, triggers more than 1,400 known physical and chemical responses and activates more than 30 different hormones. There are INTELLECTUAL and MEDICAL reasons to think positively! Toxic waste generated by toxic thoughts causes the following illnesses: diabetes, cancer, asthma, skin problems and allergies to name just a few. Consciously control your thought life and start to detox your brain!

Medical research increasingly points to the fact that thinking and consciously controlling your thought life is one of the best ways, if not the best way of detoxing your brain. It allows you to get rid of those toxic thoughts and emotions that can consume and control your mind.

Change in your thinking is essential to detoxing the brain. Consciously controlling your thought life means not letting thoughts rampage through your mind. It means learning to engage interactively with every single thought that you have, and to analyse it before you decide either to accept or reject it.

How do you go about doing that?

Through Positive Affirmations!

Every thought actually generates molecules! You can literally create new neurons, repair DNA damage and heal your body with positive affirmations.

This is because, our creative mind begins to look for the reality that matches our thoughts, and we begin to naturally notice the opportunities that can help lead us to our goals.

Not familiar with affirmations?

I've attached a general affirmation you can say in the morning or as many times throughout the day as you would like.

“Whatever you fear most has no power – it is your fear that has the power. The thing itself cannot touch you. But if you allow your fear to seep into your mind and overtake your thoughts, it will rob you of your life.” 

- Oprah Winfrey